a heart piece

TRUST. how do you define it? if you were to quickly hit a google search for the word trust you would come upon this:

firm belief in the reliability, truth, ability, or strength of someone or something. some synonyms would come up as confidence, belief, faith, etc.

i know. you’re sitting here wondering why on earth i’m relaying the definition of trust to you, because lets be real, we all know it. however, if we proclaim the knowledge of the meaning of trust, does that mean we actually TRUST? for me, trust has been difficult. some of my worldly relationships have ended, leaving me with a lack of trust. i have personally lacked self confidence many times in my life, which in reality means i cannot trust myself. i haven’t believed my body is good enough or my work that i present is never enough. that is indeed a lack of trust in my abilities. recently, my life has been messy. there have been tears. there have been moments of anxiety, fear, anger. you name it and i’ve probably met with it face to face within the past few weeks. it has been hard to go sleep because i feel extremely anxious at night. there is a story behind all these emotions, but we can get to that another time. however, i tell you all this to make a point. i tell you all this to share a piece of my heart with you all, which is that i have had to learn to place my trust in God all over again. the more i think about it, that surrendering action should be done every single day. it shouldn’t be something i learn as i bounce from trial to trial. that’s a heart piece.

we are all a work in progress. the Lord promises trials and tribulations, but He also promises that we will not go through it alone. i seem to belive that sometimes we get so caught up in our worldly strengths that we can easily fall into the belief that we are in control of our lives. that we can do all things through OURSELVES because we provide ourselves with our very own strengths. (trust me, i’m completely guilty of this.) i get into a routine. this routine contains fruitful moments with community and vulnerable moments where i begin to fall more in love with Jesus. but those moments aren’t enough. my routine should start with guarding myself with armor that is indestructible. the armor of God. arming myself with the truths in which i live by. the other day, i was flipping through my Bible and came upon a brightly highlighted page with BIG bold letters. Philippians 4:13 was highlighted and in the margin in big bold letters it read, “LET’S DO THIS, 2017”

 “I can do all things through him who strengthens me.”

i chuckled. so, roughly a year ago, my heart declared that i will do life through HIM who gives me strength. and then i laughed some more. because this verse is so ~original~, right? it’s a typical “hipster Christian” verse. you can most likely find it in Instagram bios, or in the tweets where people are announcing their D1 athletic commits. and what do we do? we sigh and say, “original, next.” trust me, i’m guilty of it. BUT WAIT!!! HOW INSANELY CRAZY OF ME!!! because that “basic” scripture that seems to be planted everywhere still holds an insane amount of heavy truth. it holds a piece of truth in which we should armor ourselves in. it holds weight in declaring that our strength comes from God. it holds weight in the fact that our Father loves us enough to supply us with a little piece of His strength through His very own son.

let’s not grow too independent in which we forget the simple beauty in the TRUTH of God that we get to take part in. let’s not get too caught up in our very own doing that we forget who we are doing it for, who we get to do it with!!! so, here are some simple truths that i want to begin to declare over my life starting NOW!

  1. He strengthens me, and i may face anything.
  2. He loves me.
  3. He allows nothing to separate me from Him.
  4. He will never leave me.
  5. He will always be faithful towards me.
  6. He will turn my shame into radiance.

they are simple. they are beautiful. typing those words caused my heart to be so overwhelmed i am now crying in a Starbucks. (don’t worry, this happens often.) instead of getting frustrated with my humanity and angry that this simple truth can be difficult to remain confident in, i am going to take the forgiveness the Lord has already granted me and run with these truths. i am going to run with His strength, not my own. however, that does not mean i will not fall. what it does mean is that i will be confident that He will catch me when I do rather than fearful that my own strength cannot hold my up.

so, here’s to trusting in Him, no matter how strong our earthly self thinks it is. here’s to surrendering. here’s to letting Him handle it. here’s to the simple truths in which we are wildly unworthy of. here’s to His kindness. here’s to God’s full being and loving character; i pray we not only fall in love with it, but fall into it. i pray over each of you who had the chance to read this heart piece and i pray you can look at your own heart and see if you have one too. i pray we all can find our truths in which the Lord has graciously given us. i pray we wake up and declare those truths over ourselves and never grow weary. God loves you with an everlasting love, and if you’re in need of a reminder, go searching in His word. you never know, sometimes the simplest of scriptures write the most beautiful love letters. go ahead and receive yours. He has already written it.

xoxo, kirsty

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